On the Bus

We all come here to chat with one another. Each of us has our own reasons for coming here. And each of us has at one time or another, experienced some kind of behavior that we did not like.

There are some important things to remember. Everything that you post to the internet stays there. Forever! For anyone to read! I do not know what the copyright agreement is , whether our post belong to Edwina or Para chat and how protected they are. Also almost everyone who comes here to chat is mentally ill! Some more than others.

Trolls! If you are reading this, there may be hope for you. These may some of the most ill people that you encounter on the internet. They are just looking for attention, and are not particular what kind they get. In the mental health chat rooms they neither ask for, nor offer help. They do not even want to friends with people. Do not try to talk to them, argue with them, or even call them names. Operant conditioning! Ignore them. They “ignore” feature of this room helps. Click on the name to the left to highlight it, then click on the “ignore” button. Nuff said!

Troll-like behavior. These people too, may be seriously ill or episodic. They sometimes carry on a conversation with themselves, say irrational things, and fail to relate to others in the room by acknowledging their post. You might be able to start a conversation with one of these. Use your judgment. If it is someone you know, you may want to carry them. If not, you may want to direct them to this blog. Otherwise, ignore or sign off and come back later.

Then there is what I like to call, “The Lord of The Flies” effect. Simply put, it is mob rule. One person says something stupid, someone else jumps on their case, then everybody else has to jump in also. I’ve done it. It is easy to get caught up. Generally, the ensuing defecations and condemnations are even more stupid than the original remark! Try not to do this. The people that come to mental health chat rooms have an illness. JUST LIKE YOU! They ma be having an episode and/or not completely in control. The things said in these lynch mobs can be more than just offensive, they can end friendships, and do long term damage to someone elses wellness and recovery.

The dating game. Most of us live so far apart there is hardly any chance of actually meeting that other person, let alone getting “horizontal” together. They have been a few happy cases of people who have found each other. Very rare! Generally, the mentally ill have lousy relationships. You could hurt someone , or get hurt yourself. Once again, screwing yours or that other persons wellness and recovery. Those may the only things that get screwed. There is an old saying, “don’t sleep with anyone who’s problems are worse than your own!” In this case, “don’t sleep with anyone who’s taking more medication than you!”

Hyper sexuality. This is an unfortunate symptom of Bi-polarity. When manic, people may actually believe that they are attractive and alluring. A lot of the sexual banter and “I love you’s‘” are tongue-in-cheek and “for entertainment purposes only.” Please, no wagering! I get a kick out the cyber suave de bon aire’s who actually think that they are going to get in the pants of some gal (or guy) a thousand miles away! I used to be one! If they are such a hot product, how come they are some geek on the internet, instead of out on the town with some hot bod? You silver-fingered-devils!

Chronic cacaphonia. Samuel Johnson used to say, “profanity is the refuge of the illiterate.” I’m no prude. I use it. But at times it is ridiculous. I like to compare to the cub scout troop that has just learned all these new, forbidden words.

Remember, this is a mental health chat room. Some people may be prone, from time to time, to say and do things that they regret later. If you have never done anything like that, you probably do not belong here! Everyone expects compassion for the mistakes that they make. But it seems hard for the same people to give it to others. If it is something you would not say with your mother in the room, in mixed company, or face-to-face with that other person, you probably should not say it here! Try to avoid cutting to the quick and doing permanent damage. The mentally ill can be very sensitive.

A couple thousand years ago, a famous rabbi is attributed to have said, “taking back words that have been said, is like removing the salt from water in which it has been mixed,” yet another famous rabbi said, “what is distasteful to yourself, do not do to others.” Much later it was paraphrased by anther famous rabbi, “Do unto others, as you would have others do unto you!”